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I am an Autistic person,not a person with autism. I am also not Aspergers. The diagnosis isn't even in the DSM anymore, and yes, I agree with the consolidation of all autistic spectrum stuff under one umbrella. I have other issues with the DSM.

I don't like Autism Speaks. I'm Disabled, not differently abled, and I am an Autistic activist. Self-advocate is true, but incomplete.

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MLA: Zisk, Alyssa Hillary. "Post Title." Yes, That Too. Day Month Year of post. Web. Day Month Year of retrieval.

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Monday, March 16, 2015

Processing

Content Notes: Death, Cancer

Two weeks ago today, my grandfather passed away.

It wasn't a shock. He had cancer. He'd had it for a few years, and I'd known it was terminal for nearly a year. (He'd known, intellectually, for longer, but I don't think he really believed it.) He'd had a stroke in November as well, less than a week after he played football in the backyard at his 80th birthday party.

A month ago, I was told that he was going downhill fairly quickly. I had planned to visit him two weeks ago yesterday (Sunday) but on Saturday was told that Sunday might be too late. So I got up to see him on Saturday. He wasn't able to talk anymore, but he was still responsive in other ways. I talked to him some, I sat in the room with him, that sort of thing.

He wasn't expected to last the night, on Saturday, but he made it to Monday afternoon. That... was actually pretty typical of him. He made semifinals of a tennis tournament last summer too, with a chemo pump in his back pocket and against people who were mostly half his age or less. I'm not quite sure how he managed this, considering what chemotherapy does to people. Or what cancer does.

He was one of the stubbornest people I've ever known. (No, really. It was impressive.)

And he was an engineer. Not by traditional college education- he was a lawyer first- but primarily self-taught, and then taking the fundamentals of engineering and professional engineering exams.

I'm not sure what song this is from, but I heard it today. "I wear your grandad's clothes. I look incredible."

Well.

Actually, my jacket is from my grandpa.
My youngest sister has acquired his suspenders.
My dad has his Patriots hoodie now.
I think my brother might have reclaimed his sweatpants, but I'm not sure? (He gave grandpa a pair of sweatpants during stroke rehab.)

The rest of the song didn't line up with the thoughts those lines brought up, but.
We wear my grandad's clothes. We look incredible. But you'd probably never guess they were my grandad's clothes, because he didn't dress like most folk's idea of an 80 year old man. (See also: Patriots hoodie.)

I miss him.

2 comments:

  1. May your grandfather's memory be a blessing.

    ReplyDelete
  2. The song was Thrift Shop by Macklemore & Ryan Lewis.

    ReplyDelete

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