Note For Anyone Writing About Me

Guide to Writing About Me

I am an Autistic person,not a person with autism. I am also not Aspergers. The diagnosis isn't even in the DSM anymore, and yes, I agree with the consolidation of all autistic spectrum stuff under one umbrella. I have other issues with the DSM.

I don't like Autism Speaks. I'm Disabled, not differently abled, and I am an Autistic activist. Self-advocate is true, but incomplete.

Citing My Posts

MLA: Hillary, Alyssa. "Post Title." Yes, That Too. Day Month Year of post. Web. Day Month Year of retrieval.

APA: Hillary, A. (Year Month Day of post.) Post Title. [Web log post]. Retrieved from

Thursday, April 2, 2015

The Worst Nightmare You Don't Know

I am your worst, I am your worst nightmare,
You, you will suck, the life out of me.
You're trying to save me, stop holding your breath.
I'm just a problem that doesn't want to be solved.
Tired of being what you want me to be,
I am your worst, I am your worst nightmare,
Stab me with your steely knives, but you just can't kill the beast!

I'm a failure to you, a failure to you, yes I'm a failure to you.
Can it be, I'm not meant to play this part?
Oh, my soul needs to be free
I'm through with playing by the rules of someone else's game.
Bury it, I won't let you bury it.
I won't let you murder it, I won't let you smother it.
All I want to do is be more like me and be less like you.

I am your worst, I am your worst nightmare,
You don't know what it's like to be like me.
Get along with the voices inside of my head!
I'm not drowning; there's no one here to save.
I'm through accepting limits cause someone says they're so.
The flaw you're looking for does not exist,
It's just a figment of the higher man's tongue.
All I want to do is be more like me and be less like you.
I am your worst, I am your worst nightmare,

This poem is echolalic, pulling from song lyrics. I used lyrics from:
Novocaine- Fall Out Boy
Monster- Eminem/Rhianna
King of Anything- Sara Berellis
Defying Gravity-Wicked
Hotel California- The Eagles
Bats in the Belfry- Dispatch
Strangers Fate- High Tide (now The Saturday Nights)
Welcome to My Life- Simple Plan
People of the Sun- PONS (now The Saturday Nights)
Numb-Linkin Park
Open Up- Dispatch
Time is Running Out-Muse

I may attempt to record this at some point, we'll see.

In this poem, "I" is me/autism/autistic me, and "you" would be the folks who for some reason think autism is the scariest thing ever, just to be clear.

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