Accomodating Ourselves

Another one for Autism NOW, I actually wrote it a while ago. I haven't had language thoughts between then and now this time, though, I think it's mostly fine. 

One of the skills I have found most valuable is being able to accommodate myself in most environments. See, there is an unfortunate tendency to discriminate against people with all sorts of disabilities, regardless of what the ADA might say. However, when I can make the needed changes myself without having to explain that I'm autistic, no one really cares. It's usually OK to be "just weird."
So these are some things I have come up with that we can sometimes do to accommodate ourselves, often without needing to bring up the fact that we are autistic.

• Noise-canceling headphones are growing more accepted in office environments. Get a good pair and carry them with you everywhere! When it gets too loud, bring them out!
  
• Also carry some earplugs if you can wear them. There are plenty of earplugs that just take everything down ~10dB, which can make the difference between an acceptable level of noise and being overloaded. This is what I do at some concerts, since I like live music, but the volume is usually too high. This can be done anywhere that visible noise-cancellation would be a problem, but the volume needs reducing.
  
• Always have a ready excuse to leave social events early. Events can lead to overload, but if you have a reason that you need to leave early, you can get out and decompress.
  
• Know where the quiet areas are in any building that you spend significant time in. You can usually manage to get away for a few minutes without attracting notice, and that time to decompress can make a huge difference.
  
• Carry a stim toy that you can play with discretely. Stimming in public might not be socially accepted yet, but they can't yell at you for what they can't see!
  
• Also bring a favorite stim toy, even if it's not discrete. As long as it's in your bag, you can bring it when you go to that quiet area that you found. Or you can spin/flap/rock there. Whatever you need to do, find somewhere that you can.
  
• If losing speech happens, get a text-to-speech program for your computer. Lie about the reason if you have to ("After that time when I lost my voice on the day of my big presentation, I've made sure I always have a computer with text-to-speech and my whole presentation typed out, just in case!" might be a decent one.) Then bring that computer with you everywhere.
  
• If phones are a problem, don't give out the number/tell people to text you. Nowadays, if you say text, most people will. And of course, if it's outside work hours, you can happen to have stepped away from the phone.
  
• Especially for bigger presentations: If it's causing sensory overload, leave. Presenters mostly won't notice, and attendance, if taken, is usually taken early on.
  
• If possible, find work that won't cause overload. It's much easier to accommodate yourself in a situation that isn't going to cause major problems anyways.
  
• College: Don't be afraid to drop a class if the teacher has a problem with this. With the exception of small schools, there are very few classes that the same teacher always gets, and if you need to wait until someone else teaches it, that's what you do.
  
• Sometimes there will be one person there who you feel comfortable telling. If there is one, tell them, and that person can often make small accommodations in meeting design and activities for anything they are running and provide excuses for you to leave early/arrive late at things that are going to be problematic for you. This does require finding someone trustworthy, though.
  

It is, of course, easier to get full accommodation when you are open about your disability, but there are some things you can still do while passing for merely odd.

Chinese Neurodiversity Paper "In Progress"

It's not the paper I really wanted to write, and so I only got to bits of it, mostly the ones closer to what I wanted to write. I'm not really finishing it. I'm really tabling it until after I finish my paper on the erasure of Queer Autistic people, by which time I will probably be in China. Then I will grab what I can from this to use in the paper I actually want to write.

Trigger Warnings for suicide and abuse if you read Chinese.
下面的文章谈到自杀。

神经多样性

神经多样性是什么？这个问题没有简单的回答；神经多样性是看神经异常的模仿，也是文化的运动。在神经多样性的模式中，神经异常是一个应该被尊重的独特个性，不是一个人们尝试治疗的障碍（Nciku，）。这个想法是自闭症的成人提出的，后来有别的神经分岔的(neurodivergent)人也用神经多样性看他们自己的差异，也有一些老师和父母用这个模式（介绍神经多样性，）。现在，提议神经多样性的人大多也是提议自闭症权利的人，提议自闭症接纳的人，或提议残疾人权利的人。上面是因为神经多样性的模式是从残疾人权利的说法里开始的，特别是从盲人和耳聋的人的说法里开始的。在下面，作者将会讨论自闭症的人的生存状况和残疾人权利及这两件事情跟自闭症的人权利的关系。最后，作者会讨论以上几点跟神经多样性的关系。

介绍自闭症

自闭症是一种发育障碍。如果一个人患有自闭症，那么三岁以前能看到自闭症的症状（现在，有一些医生能诊断十八个月大的小孩！）因为很多人不太清楚自闭症是什么，所以还有很多自闭症的人不知道自己是自闭的。

自闭症主要有三种障碍：在社交，在沟通，在灵活思维上都有障碍。每一个自闭症的人在这三个方面都有自己具体的问题。例如，很多自闭症的人三岁后才开始说话，或者长大后也不能说。另外一些自闭症的人有时候能说，有时候只能打字，甚至有什么时候都能说话的自闭症的人。除了说话的问题以外，别的沟通问题常常包括明白笑话与讽刺的问题。社交问题包括因为不明白别人，所以不能跟别人讲话。因为社交很难，所以让自闭症的人很累，不太愿意社交，及看不懂表情和身体语言。在灵活思维的方面，自自闭症的孩子闭症的人常对一个题目非常感兴趣，可能对别的什么都不感兴趣。有时候，自闭症的人在这个题目上的知识能跟专家一样深。每天要吃一样的菜，做一样的事情也是自闭症的人从僵化思维来的特征。

自闭症的人生存状况，社会对自闭症的看法

如果要谈自闭症的人生存状况，那么也要谈诊断的情况。在美国，医生大多知道自闭症，父母也知道自闭症。自闭症专家很多。如果孩子的发育有什么不正常，父母很快把孩子带去看医生。如果医生认为可能是自闭症，他告诉父母要带孩子去看专家。诊断会很慢，但是因为很早开始，所以孩子很小的时候已经知道他是自闭的。现在，18个月大的小孩就能被诊断。

中国诊断自闭症的情况完全不一样。很多父母相信晚一点说的小孩后来是很聪明的人，不知道这是自闭症的特点。因为不知道自闭症，父母也不知道孩子别的自闭行为真的是自闭症的特点。而且，只能生一个孩子，一方面让父母没有自己的孩子或兄弟姐妹的孩子比较，另一方面让残疾孩子更难被父母的接纳。因此，父母往往不带孩子去看医生或者等到很晚才带孩子去。WE EDITED TO HERE。

自闭症的孩子看医生也不一定被诊断，知道自闭症的医生比较少，专家更少。这是因为医生往往没有修过心理课，只能从别的知道自闭症的医生那里学习自闭症到底是什么。如果没有父母带他们自闭的孩子去医院看医生，那么医生就根本不知道自闭症的存在。如果没有懂得自闭症的医生，看医生没用，孩子不能被诊断。

还有很多医生说孩子“有自闭症的症状,”或“跟自闭症有一点类似”，不说孩子是自闭的。这样的情况是从几方面来的。

第一，自闭症是精神残疾，跟所有精神残疾一样受到偏见。医生可能因为不愿意让孩子受到这样的偏见，所以不愿意给自闭症的诊断，又可能相信孩子的障碍没有真正的自闭症那么严重。

第二，知道自闭症的医生比较少。不知道自闭症的医生又不能诊断自闭症。

第三，Aspergers自闭症是不常诊断的。很多医生不知道能说话的人也可能是自闭的。

第四，在中国，自闭症的评价只有半个小时。对神经典型(neurotypical)的医生来说，半个小时不够确定孩子是不是自闭的。（有一些自闭症的人能几分钟以内就确定，而神经典型人不能。）

诊断后，自闭症的人都面临很大的问题。

中美两国人对自闭症的了解完全不一样。美国人常不清楚自闭症是什么，但是听说过。在路上问的中国人大概没听说过自闭症。美国老师都知道自闭症,医生都知道。他们可能不太清楚自闭症的人是什么样人，最好怎么帮助自闭症的人，而他们知道自闭症的人有几个障碍。中国老师却常以为自闭症的孩子只是胡作非为。

虽然中美两国对自闭症的了解有很大的差别，但是两国自闭症的人有很多一样的问题。例如，教育是自闭症的人常面对的问题。在美国，老师都知道自闭症是什么，而不一定知道怎么最好帮助自闭症的孩子。自闭症的孩子的个别化教育计划常有问题：比如老师以为让自闭症的孩子学好“固定手势”是对他们好。再比如当别的孩子上学术课程时，自闭症的孩子却被迫去上社交课程。这样自闭症的孩子渐渐地在学术课程就落后了。进而，自闭症的孩子被认为什么都学不会，所以不被允许上学术课程。还有，一些不会说话的自闭症的人不得不用一些交流替代品，比如电脑语音软件或iPad进行交流。有些老师因为不理解，所以没有教会自闭症的人怎么使用这些替代品。还有一些老师甚至禁止他们使用。

在教育问题上，美国的自闭症的孩子大多上学，问题就是在什么学校上学，老师让他们学什么内容。（这就是Henry的问题。他想跟别的14岁的学生一起读书，学一样的内容。学校认定因为他不能说话，只能打字，所以不行。半年后学校才愿意让他上学，这个月开始跟他朋友一起上课。）-EXPLAIN THE STORY. Who is he? Why do we care?

在中国，公立学校平常不愿意接纳自闭的学生，所以父母送孩子去上残疾人的学校或不送他上学。中国的＂随班就读＂不是强制性的，不够提供自闭症的孩子和重度残疾儿的教育。因为中国医生所知道的自闭症是儿童自闭症，所以高功能自闭症的孩子不被诊断。没有诊断让这些自闭症的人没有特别的帮助，但是没有自闭症的诊断让学校容易接纳他们。没有诊断的自闭症的人大概有好一点儿的生存状况。如果没有诊断，别人会认为只是胡作非为，也会认为很奇怪。如果有诊断，不好的事情可能真的会发生。2012年，媒体报道了两次其它学生父母对学校说如果学校让自闭症的孩子继续上学，他们就“不客气了。”第一次在深圳的某中学：学校就不让自闭症的孩子上学。学校不让他上学，他就偷偷地进去。然后，学校把他的桌子拿走，他就站在教室后面听课。最后，学校终于把他拒之门外。几天后，他自杀了。

固定手势="quiet hands"

A boat! A boat!

My dad has a boat. He got it from a relative getting rid of theirs. He put it in the water today, and it was great. Because I got to ride in the boat down to the landing (it's about a mile, I never got to do that before it was so cool!) and then I was in the boat as they put it in the water, and then we got to take a boat ride. Which was made of win. I like boats.  I like the wind on my face, and the smell of the salt air, and the rocking of the boat on the water. It's great.
(In order to be on the boat for the first ride of the year, Dad's rule is that you have to know basic water survival and be a good swimmer. I am probably the strongest swimmer in the family, seeing as I can and have swum three miles without stopping. I can also swim the length of a pool (25 yard pool) without needing to breathe using butterfly, front crawl, or breaststroke. I've never tried to do so backstroke because that would be kind of pointless.) )
It was also time alone with my dad. He has some trouble with the whole "Alyssa is Autistic" thing, but not with any of the actual traits that I have. I dunno, it's weird. But we talked about life in general, and it was mostly good. He gets that I am not "normal" and never will be. He gets that this doesn't bother me. I don't think he gets how badly I would fail if I tried to be normal, but I don't think it's that huge a deal because I don't plan to try. I plan to keep being my own weird, Autistic self.
I played catch with my sister. I made pasta for dinner to share with both my sisters. It was pretty good.
Oh, and I'm fairly sure my left little toenail is about to fall off, after all this time. I injured it over spring break, about two months ago, and it's currently hanging on by a thread. Whoops. I have skills. And by skills, I mean the ability to stub my little toe hard enough to draw blood and eventually lose the nail. Blech.

I think I'm back

Normally, I write really regularly. That didn't happen this past week. I think stuff surrounding my graduation is to blame. Because seriously, I was trying to wrap up my research in nanotechnology (successfully wrapped up, though I will probably get emails due to people not being able to read my handwriting and wanting to know what things are,) move out of the dorm, graduate, and do paperwork for going to China in the fall. This past week, I did enough stuff that even without "Alyssa has some executive functioning issues" to worry about, it would have been a very full week. As it, I'm exhausted. But it's all good, I get vacation now. I like vacation.
So, as for nanotech: I took SEM pictures of my samples, it looks like I have gotten the thing to happen that I wanted to happen. I don't think I can really say more than "I took pictures and my thing worked" because I'm fairly sure the university owns the research, not me, but I can tell you that. I also had to get some help preparing my samples, because, no, we are not going to have a dyspraxic Autistic adult trying to pour from a two gallon jug of concentrated hydrofluoric acid. That is just a recipe for badness. We will have someone who is not dyspraxic and doesn't have any other kind of motor issue either do that. Hydrofluoric acid is nasty.
Moving out of the dorm I needed help with because cognitively figuring out what I need to do in order to move out is hard for me. This is where "Oh, crud, what is executive functioning?" comes in. So my mom helped me a lot with that. And it got done. Which is good.
Graduation was yesterday. I already had my degree (the math one, I've been a graduate student in one of those three majors since January,) but actually getting to walk across the stage was cool. And I had a pile of family there. And then I went home with my dad, stepmom, and siblings. (My parents divorced when I was really, really little. I have a couple memories from pre-divorce, but they aren't ones where the pre-divorce status is relevant. It's stuff like climbing in and out of my crib.)
So now I'm at my dad's and I'm done with all my school stuff. This might be the first summer I really have off in a long time. I think the summer between my sophomore and junior years of high school was the last one where I was really off, since I went to China for the three after that and then I was at school doing research all last summer.
And I'm getting ready to go to China, for a year this time. It's exciting.
Oh, and the "security" at graduation was exactly the security theater I knew it was going to be. I don't think the people doing the checks even realized I had a backpack. It was just a PR move because they figured people would be afraid. (Think fear, we do?)

Neurodiversity as part of Diversity Week

I had a meeting today with the director of my university's Multicultural Center. It was tiring. It was good. Good things happened.
I'm pretty optimistic about the administration giving the Neurodiversity Committee the funding it asked for, since it wasn't all that much, and of ten or so committees that asked for stuff after the 20,000 Voices Open Space Conference and the follow-up, our requests were the smallest. (Order of magnitude less than what the most expensive group asked for, at least. Not even joking, there were people asking for a full-time staff person.) And even if we don't get anything directly from administration? The head of the multicultural center expressed a commitment to doing one of the things we wanted (making neurodiversity part of diversity week) on his own, basically as a "the head of the multicultural center can do that" thing.
For the 2013 one this fall, they will have to run it pretty much without me, since I'll be in China, but they know they have my email and that I am pretty good about answering stuff, and that I am more than willing to. They know some of the stuff I was thinking about too...
Like, as far as "why is this important?" I mentioned that understanding other cultures is a good thing and that Autistic culture is a thing. I also talked about how being ready for more Autistic people who know they are autistic and for some who don't speak (remember, more and more Autistic people with significant support needs and/or who don't speak are in mainstream classes doing the same work and will be qualified for college if they want it) before they come (as much as possible, anyways, it's already started) is important. It's similar to building the ramp before the wheelchair user gets there, in a way- make it already accessible so that the person who needs it doesn't have to navigate an inaccessible system in order to get access.
For the 2014 Diversity Week, I'll be more directly involved since I will be back on campus and that makes a big difference for my ability to affect and participate in things that happen on campus.
So yeah. Long story short, my college is going to be getting more neurodiversity-friendly and that's got to be a good thing.