Note For Anyone Writing About Me

Guide to Writing About Me

I am an Autistic person,not a person with autism. I am also not Aspergers. The diagnosis isn't even in the DSM anymore, and yes, I agree with the consolidation of all autistic spectrum stuff under one umbrella. I have other issues with the DSM.

I don't like Autism Speaks. I'm Disabled, not differently abled, and I am an Autistic activist. Self-advocate is true, but incomplete.

Citing My Posts

MLA: Hillary, Alyssa. "Post Title." Yes, That Too. Day Month Year of post. Web. Day Month Year of retrieval.

APA: Hillary, A. (Year Month Day of post.) Post Title. [Web log post]. Retrieved from http://yesthattoo.blogspot.com/post-specific-URL.

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

To ``Why do I flap my hands"

I see you found my blog as your result when you searched for ``why do i flap my hands," and I hope you left feeling better than you came. I'm guessing you found the post Why Yes, I DO Flap My Hands. Deal With It.  I hope so, anyways, since that's probably the best post here for you to have found with that question. Because it's OK. It really is. If you flap your hands when you're excited, or when you're upset, or for any one of a million reasons, it might be because you're autistic. And that's OK. I don't know if you'll see this, but if you do, here are some things to think about, preferably without freaking out:
1) As far as I know, that most likely means you're autistic (somewhere on the spectrum. Don't worry; it's still OK.) It's not the DSM, which you can find if you want, but a pretty good checklist of what an autistic person thinks can tell autistic from not is here. I happen to like it because it includes strengths and weaknesses, instead of focusing on the weaknesses like the DSM does. (Yes, the comment from June 2 is me.)
2) Getting evaluated may or may not be helpful to you, depending on a variety of factors. Assuming that you are autistic here, but... just because YOU know you're autistic doesn't necessarily mean it's in your best interest to let anyone else know that you're autistic. Some people are good about it, some aren't. Choosing to seek a diagnosis or not is a choice only you can make. (If you're under 18, you can choose ``not" by way of not telling anyone that you're suspicious. Choosing ``yes" could be a little harder, though, because of the part where you're a minor and your parents are in charge still.)
3) You're not alone, whichever choice you make. I put the pieces together a good bit before I got evaluated because in my specific high school situation, a diagnosis wouldn't have been helpful. I wasn't the only one who put the pieces together at that point, but the other people who did were good about not pushing the issue of getting an eval vs. not. Others get diagnosed as young children. Others know and choose never to seek diagnosis. It's OK, whichever way you go.
4) Whatever you may have been told, autistic adults exist, and autism is not uniformly tragic/strictly bad. There are parts that are pretty awesome and parts that really stink. Awesome: I will take you all down at math unless you have WAY more experience with me, and all your four leaf clovers are belong to me. Stinky: LOUD. LOUD IS BAD. Also, the tendency to not pick up on it when someone is joking or asking a rhetorical question is pretty annoying. And of course, the whole range of disability that you probably think when you hear ``autism," since the self-harming stims do exist and all. Not for everyone autistic, and not for me, but it exists.
5) Breathe. You'll be fine. You can choose to talk to autistics about your concerns or not, conclude that you probably are autistic or not, seek diagnosis or not, and it's all fine. Just do me a favor and don't tell me that I identify myself wrong or that I'm not really autistic if I don't want a ``cure," and we're probably good.

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I reserve the right to delete for personal attacks, derailing, dangerous comparisons, bigotry, and generally not wanting my blog to be a platform for certain things. As long as we stay within those ranges, discussion is AWESOME.